| August 19, 2005 Red Alert by Soren Wuerth Picking
up the dog doody for your country
Thousands of warm-hearted Americans recently called to adopt a deceased Boy Scout’s dog named “Critter.” After four Alaskan scout leaders were killed when they set their tent up beneath a power line at a jamboree last month, the story of Critter’s adoption had a “tail-wagging” ending, a reporter wrote. The outpouring of sympathy for a dog is curious from the angle of a western Alaska village. Here, on “Extermination Days,” stray dogs are shot then dragged to the dump by a four-wheeler. The other day, I saw a young girl trying to flog a pregnant bitch with a metal pipe. It might strike your average American Boy Scout family has a harsh form of rural justice, but that’s the way it is in real communities, where loose dogs carry pestilence and residents resort to a practical method of animal control. The Boy Scout, as the ultimate American archetype, is as lost to reality and as intoxicated with beguiled hopefulness as was that glib father of the Brady Bunch. And, like their Nazi-Germany equivalent Hitler Jugend, they are a convenient pre-armed service, pre-corporate, or pre-Republican recruitment cult. Lewis Lapham, writing about our “make-believe democracy” in his July Harper’s editorial, uses the sunny Boy Scout visage as a metaphor for the sanctimonious perspective of Americans toward their leaders, corporate or otherwise. Lapham refers to George Bush’s scoutish persona—“helpful, cheerful, courteous, loyal, friendly, obedient, and clean”—which, like thick, latex paint, coats the cracks of a shifting Republic. It has always been such a delusion. “The pioneers moving west of the Mississippi,” writes Lapham, “chose for their captains men who could hearten them with descriptions of the land of milk and honey awaiting their arrival, like tomorrow’s economic recovery or the democratic transformation of Iraq, just around the next bend in the river or across the next range of hills.” The American patriot selfishly plunders forward, “John Rockefeller, emerging unscathed from the wreckage of Standard Oil Trust, President Clinton wriggling free of Monica Lewinsky’s thong.” Lapham reserves his most glittery awards to World Com CEO Bernie Ebbers and Tyco CEO Dennis Kozlowski. “As firm of purpose as two Boy Scouts earning merit badges, they acquired more companies, bought bigger yachts, paid $500,000 for wall paper strewn with hand-painted birds” while eliminating jobs, and sending their companies into tailspins. Rather than earning badges for false patriotism, kids should spend their time critically examining (their own) culture. ******** The Red: Report Price of crude: $65.90 per barrel Price of global warming in 1993: $60 billion Price to taxpayers of a Ted Stevens appropriation to develop salmon baby food: $443,000 Price to taxpayers of a Stevens earmark for a lobbyist who is Steven’s brother-in-law: $9.6 million. Soren Wuerth is perhaps Alaska's best known community activist. He resides in an undisclosed location in Southeast Alaska and can be reached at soren@insurgent49.com. |
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| Copyright
2005
Insurgent Media. All Rights
Reserved. in-sur-gent (in sur'jent), n. 1. a member of a group which revolts against the policies of its leadership. |
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