The standard cliché about President Bush is getting pretty threadbare. You know, the one where he is called King George, and compared to the revolutionary war era British monarch of the same name. It was cute for a while, but overuse has tarnished it. Lets see if we can come up with something fresh.

     How about comparing him to Saint George? You’ve heard of him. According to legend, he killed a dragon and saved a bunch of people. There are some pretty good parallels.

     For those who do not remember the story, it goes something like this:

     In the country of Libya, a dragon lived in a lake, and terrorized the local villagers. To appease the dragon, the villagers set up a lottery system, and a daily human sacrifice was offered to the dragon. Saint George comes to the rescue on the day when the King’s own daughter has been selected by lottery as the human sacrifice. Saint George wounds the dragon with his lance, and then asks the princess for her girdle, which he wraps around the dragon’s neck. They are then able to lead the still living dragon into the village. After the grateful (or terrorized) villagers agree to convert to Christianity, Saint George kills the dragon with his sword. You can read more about the legend of Saint George here.

     The story tracks well with what President Bush claims he is trying to do in Iraq. A Christian warrior brings his weapons into a non-Christian nation, frees them from the tyranny of an evildoer who kills the local people, and earns the gratitude and respect of the people he saves.

     Of course, things have not gone as well for our own “Saint George” as they did for the Saint George of legend. The original Saint George is alleged to have done his own fighting. Our Saint George relies on other warriors to do his fighting for him.

     Our own Saint George can’t seem to kill that pesky dragon. He can’t even seem to find it. He has been chasing all over Iraq, doing lots of fighting and killing. He cuts off a head here and there, but the dragon seems to be getting even stronger. The victims of the dragon continue to pile up, right alongside George Bush’s own victims.

     The people of Iraq, far from being grateful, overwhelmingly want “Saint George” to leave their country. They certainly are not agreeing to convert to Christianity. It seems that our own Saint George falls just a teensy bit short of the standards set by the Saint George of legend.

     Despite his shortcomings, President Bush just recently said in a 60 Minutes interview that “We liberated that country from a tyrant. I think the Iraqi people owe the American people a huge debt of gratitude.”

     Some of my friends have been wondering what President Bush has been smoking. Spending so much time chasing the dragon may have gone to his head. “Chasing the dragon” is a slang phrase for inhaling the fumes from heated opium or heroin. In that context, it could certainly help explain why he is so divorced from reality.

     Our Saint George needs to spend less time chasing the dragon, and more time trying to repair the massive amounts of damage he has already caused.

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